Tuesday, 1 September 2009

If only real life were that good...

Joe the Lawyer has put up an interesting thread at therpgsite: If you could play D&D with anyone, real or imaginary, from any time in history, who?

My answer was JRR Tolkien, CS Lewis, Johnathan Swift and Roald Dahl. On reflection I'd also like to include Jorge Luis Borges. Our games would take place in a Member's club, complete with leather seats, tobbaco pipes, and plentiful bitter served by buxom wenches. We'd have a rotating DM-ship, meeting up every Sunday evening. CS Lewis would grumble about Tolkien's insistence on correct pronunciation of Elvish names ("Not another bloody elf..."); Borges would rile Tolkien with his anti-clerical barbs; Roald Dahl would amuse everybody with his comic creations; and Swift would confound with his unusual 18th Century phrasing.

When China Mieville, M. John Harrison, Richard K. Morgan and Michael Moorcock came in to the club for their weekly game of Dogs in the Vineyard, it would be like the Sharks vs. the Jets. Dice-downs with fistfuls of d12s flying. Bruised lips, bloody noses and black eyes. Finally everybody would settle down and it would be Tolkien's turn to get the drinks in.


  1. Hmmm...I guess I'd play with Robert Howard, H.P. Lovecraft, George R.R. Martin and Cormac McCarthy. Love this idea!

  2. H. G. Wells, Clark Ashton Smith, Richard F. Burton, Mark Twain, Jeff Rients. Ernie Hemingway occasional drop-in player.

    Clark would have to get with the program on the bad-ass facial hair front. He'd be letting the side down otherwise... ;)

    Good call on the location. Nothing quite like wing back chairs, a green baize game table, and a butler circulating with the brandy. Those dirty narrativists should have been blackballed though (*harrumph, bristle*).

  3. Our first 3 (Tolkien, Lewis, Swift) are exactly the same.

  4. I like the cut of your jib.

    I have no idea what Dogs in the Vineyard is, so I'll defer to your judgement, but after reading The Steel Remains I had Richard Morgan pegged as a Riddle of Steel guy (everyone gets disemboweled, beheaded, or maimed each session, so bring a lot of PCs).

  5. Isn't it obvious? Gary Gygax, Al Gore, Stephen Hawking, Nichelle Nichols and Big Blue...

  6. I'll bet Dickens would have been a crafty GM.

  7. But how could you possibly belong to a gentleman's club that would let that lefty cad Mieville in?

    Actually I believe he is a roleplayer when not being a novelist so probably a good choice.

    Off the top of my head I'd want Lewis Carroll and William Blake alternating as GM. EE Doc Smith for some ridiculously high-level Space Opera.

  8. Neil Gaiman, Alice Cooper, Stephen Colbert, and Dame Judi Dench.

    All of them have the advantage of being known to play D&D, too, so it could actually happen.

    V-word: Ponsumme: No idea, but I think it's probably some sorto f French dessert

  9. PatrickWR: You know George RR Martin is a gamer? I heard him give an interview once where he said at one stage in his 30s he thought gaming might take over his life. He was running games 3 times a week and doing absolutely no writing.

    Chris: Does Jeff Rients have bad ass facial hair?

    Zach: Great minds think alike. ;)

    Brian Murphy: It's a nice little game, but one of those ones which the 'hip' gamers like to push a little too much.

    I heard you on the sff podcast talking about Morgan, by the way. You pretty much summed up my own thoughts on the guy.

    Rognar: Al Gore!? That surprises me.

    JB: Lots of interesting NPCs, that's for certain.

    Coopdevil: Oh yeah, Blake would be great. I think it would be hard to have him get along with CS Lewis and Tolkien though. Every week it would descend into theological violence.

    Rach: Judi Dench plays D&D?

  10. There are SOOOO many people I would love to play D&D with. In terms of a classic "Dead DM's Society" type vibe wth a bunch of writers as playing cohorts, I would choose R.E. Howard, H.P. Lovecraft, Arthur Conan Doyle, Jonathon Swift, Mary Shelley, John Milton,and J.R.R. Tolkien. If I had to pick "Famous or Cool People Who Would Probably Be Cool To Play With", I would have to pick Vin Diesel, Jack Black, James Franco, Dave Grohl, Bruce Sterling, Douglas Coupland, and Kari Byron, Grant Imahara and Tory Belleci from MYTHBUSTERS. However, the final category of "Normal (?) people who I wuld love to play D&D with" would be James Mishler, James Maliszewski, Jeff Rients, Michael Curtis, David Bowman, Mike D. (from SWORD +1), Erin Palette, and Chgowiz (from CHGOWIZ'S OLD-GUY RPG BLOG).

  11. Dieselboy (a DJ who actually played D&D), Tim Burton, Tarantino and Terry Pratchett.


  12. That's easy...L. Frank Baum, Jim Henson, Robin Williams, Brian Froud and Tony Diterlizzi.

    I love larger groups so I'd probably have each of them bring someone, be it a friend, wife or kid.

    The game would be my modified Faery's Tale Deluxe (Firefly Games).

    Funny thing is that I have met several of these individuals on numerous occasions and became quite chummy with a couple. I leave who to the imagination. In addition a few of them are (or at least were) gamers.

    Man that game would be sweeet!

  13. Noisms: Yes, she does. For her grandchildren, so I'm told. She ran a few sessions for Vin Diesel when they were shooting The Chronicles of Riddick

  14. Al Gore and the others are a reference to a Futurama episode. Less obvious than I thought, I suppose.

  15. The Badger King: Now that's just greedy. ;)

    Frederic: Obviously!

    Barking Alien: Tony Diterlizzi obviously was (is?) a gamer, and I've heard that Robin Williams was (is?) too.

    Rach: That's just weird.

    Rognar: I never watched enough Futurama, sorry!

  16. I like playing DnD with girls.

  17. Zak S.: Are you mad? They have germs.